By Susan Hollaway
I’m officially a blogger now! Woo-hoo! Cartwheel! I have to admit I’m really excited about getting a blog. I’m thinking you figured that out though, eh? =) Initially, I was excited and scared at the same time to go public with a blog. I’m still excited and a little scared, but I took the leap into the big blogosphere, as a new friend calls it, and it feels good. I feel as if I’ve accomplished something. I moved past my fears and inhibitions. I’m not saying those fears won’t try to creep back in sometimes. But I’m not going to borrow trouble. I love the saying, “Fear knocked at the door. Faith answered. No one was there.”
Anyway, I’ll just say it……I am a writer. Granted, at this point, the only things I’ve published were news articles and photos in the area newspapers when I was a journalism student in high school, and that was a long time ago. I’ve wanted to write almost my entire life, but kept putting it off and not trying because I was afraid. Afraid of what, you ask? I mean, it’s just putting pen to paper or fingers to a keyboard….what’s to be afraid of? Well, it stems from a lack of self-confidence and fear of failing. Go ahead, you know you want to do the eye roll thing. It’s okay. I know it’s ridiculous. In fact, my own daughter said to me, “You can’t fail if you don’t try, Mom. But you also can’t succeed if you don’t try either.” Wow! Wise words from a 13-year-old.
I was annoying myself that I still had this desire to write, but was doing nothing about it. I was getting weary of fighting the inner struggle. I don’t know what took me so long, but I finally turned the whole thing over to God and asked that if it wasn’t in His will for me to write, then to just take away my desire to write altogether. Well, He only made the desire stronger in my heart. So, I’m trusting in God and following His lead. “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, And do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He will make your paths straight.” (Prov. 3:5-6 NASB)
All I know is that I have to write. And I have to give God the glory for it. I write inspirational romance and whatever else God puts on my heart. I have no idea if God only wants me to write so He can teach me something or if His intent is for me to be published someday. Maybe both. I’ll just have to wait and see where He takes me. In the meantime, I’m going to remember that, “I can do all things through Him (Christ) who strengthens me. ” (Phil 4:13) So, I’m writing. In a nutshell, I’m going to obey, pray, and hang on for the ride!
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